HindSight is 2020

This year has been a rollercoaster. Personally, I really struggled to understand the meaning behind all of the challenges that 2020 brought. I have been frustrated, mad, outraged, overwhelmed, anxious, grief stricken, and often frankly scared. I hit max capacity multiple times and often all in one day!! As this year comes to a close I find my need to reflect and process 2020 even more important then previous years; as Hindsight is 2020!!

As each year comes to an end, like many of you, I feel compelled to take stock of the lessons that unfolded and celebrate the achievements. Usually this is easy, fun and celebratory; however, for 2020, as with everything this year, it seems more important and necessary for peace of mind and process.

So, as I reflect on the losses, blessings and the unseen shifts and gifts 2020 has bestowed upon me, I thought it important to share as I believe in collective healing. I share these personal and professional shifts to inspire, reflect and encourage us all to move towards healing, abundance and the ability to be more present.

Lesson #1: Listen to Your Gut (Inner Wisdom)

At the end of 2019 I had a lot of optimism … 2019 was an outstanding year for personal growth, family fun and Labor of Love had supported more families than I could have ever imagined when I first opened this business in 2013.

The latter half of 2019 for me was spent in designing an on-line version of Connected Childbirth, the childbirth class I spent 5 years teaching and perfecting in person. I had big hopes for how many people we could impact with an on-line version of our childbirth course that approaches birth through connection; connection to yourself, your body, your partner and your deepest strength regardless of HOW you birth. As I truly believe that the hardest things we do make us stronger than ever before and birth offers us such opportunity.

In creating an on-line version, it was a big financial and time investment for Labor of Love. I had no idea if I was making the right decision and honestly doubted myself along the way as it took 6 months of constant and dedicated work learning the programs and making the course as great as I needed it to be (I tend to be a perfectionist).

AND, what a blessing this investment was as 2020 unfolded. I am forever grateful that I listened to my gut and moved forward with designing an on-line option. This investment and preparation allowed Labor of Love to seamlessly support our clients as the world shut down back in March.

Even in doubt, I listened to the call. Creating Connected Childbirth online challenged so much for me and at times I wanted to quit. I am not sure what we would have done if I hadn't followed my inner compass and completed the project as I have not been able to teach in person for over 9 months (I miss it soooo much).

Listening to that call enabled Labor of Love to continue to support families that desire an in-depth, partner based, non-agenda, self-care birthing class unlike any hospital or prescribed birthing method course out there. And, it has been surreal to hear the feedback and responses from our on-line community. To hear how the course gave them the confidence and the ability to meet this moment on their own terms. How they looked forward to the course, like a date night, able to watch in the comfort and safety of their homes, together. For our online community, I can't thank you enough for your trust.

Trusting my gut is repeated lesson that I continue to learn over and over again! One day I will feel completely confident in it and 2020 has certainly helped me get there faster!

To celebrate, for those that haven't taken the plunge we are offering 20% for the New Year! If you haven't joined in on the fun use code 2021 for 20% off Connected Childbirth.

Lesson #2: Body First

Early in 2020 I read Patriarchy Stress Disorder by Dr. Valerie Rein, and it spoke to me in absolutely every way. The book helped me make connections concerning personal, cultural, collective, and ancestral trauma. It allowed me to recognize how important it is for my overall health to invest in regulating my nervous system.

Tending to my nervous system allowed me to respond to 2020 in a very different way. Instead of living in hyper-reactivity, stress and triggers, I was able to recognize when I needed to attend to my body and anxiety so that it didn’t overrun me. 2020 allowed me the time and need to hone these skills.

Doing the work and understanding the concepts in Patriarchy Stress Disorder, that effects us all, on a deeper level has empowered me to make the next step in my own work and evolution. I started my Podcast, a long time dream of mine; Birthing into the Great Unknown. The mission is to highlight transformation, personal growth and healing through our struggles.

The Podcast is the first step in creating a community and program for women to go deeper, connect to their inner wisdom and heal the disconnect that keeps us dissatisfied, frustrated and angry. Stay tuned for an opportunity to be a part of this community. If you are attracted to my work and desire to be informed of future opportunities to be a part of an intimate group working towards unpacking trauma and investing in intentional living, please email me directly (staciberrey@gmail.com).

Lesson #3: Mediate & Breath Deeply EVERYDAY (Even if you only have 2 minutes)

This lesson was the LOUDEST; get quiet, get still and BREATH. Many of you know that I have a Master’s in Buddhism, was a yogi for much of my life and teach relaxation and mediation in my courses; and, 2020 has truly shown me what it means to get centered.

Heading into 2021, I now have a daily meditation practice that is essential to my wellbeing. It has become such a central part of our household that my husband and my children don’t only see me and recognize what I am doing but also often participate too.

Mediation has become pivotal for me in remembering that we are not the chaos, that the news does not define us (it only highlights the extreme), that we all are part of the whole and everyone of us is hardwired for peace. Only when we are disconnected from our truest selves does the fear and worry take over. I am grateful for this practice and use the app Chopra for inspiration.

Lesson #4: Trust in Abundance

Lastly, 2020 has taught me to sit and trust life’s abundance. Life is always and constantly building and creating abundance. Neither good nor bad, our world moves towards growth. Even this virus is hardwired to flourish. Life moves toward abundance in all forms and ways. Expansion is inevitable and abundance IS the rule of nature.

I have sat in my backyard for months now mediating on abundance. The trees, the birds, the sky, the plants, the air have all been my guide as abundance is all around us, everything is always moving towards more. It only takes this small awareness to notice and invite abundance into your life.

I try to have a daily ritual of honoring abundance in my life. When I start to get overwhelmed by the day to day chores and/or the enormity of the world's problems, I focus my mind on the abundance in my life. I am grateful for the abundance of dishes as they signify that my family is fed. I am grateful for the amount of endless laundry as that means my household is full of people that I love who are safe and protected. I focus on my community that kind, gentle and taken care of me during the pandemic; an abundance of support and often from places I didn't expect!! It is a work in progress and honoring the abundance in my life helps me focus on the good.

While 2020 was not what I expected nor wanted, I am forever grateful for this pause as it has helped me fine tune my own compass and navigational skills, I have deepen my relationship with myself which in turn allows me to connect deeper with all those around me.

Like many of you, I had to take exceptionally good care of myself this year too. I made sure that I moved my body daily, slept well, released emotions, talked about struggles, ate nourishing food, reached out to friends, connected to my family, danced, sang, laughed and cried.

Taking care of ourselves this year also means that may of us had to make some hard decisions, possibly saying goodbye to people we love, stepping away from toxic environments and turning towards better understanding of ourselves.

I want to honor how hard this year has been AND how strong we all are!!

Hopefully, if anything, 2020 has showed you just how powerful you are, are needed you are and how loved you are.